don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
