You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
