i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Randomize
