I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
