I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
