Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
