She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
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