Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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