i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
