**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
