I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
