I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
