The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
you never un-have a 4some
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
