i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
