He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Randomize
