is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
