i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
