I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
