Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
