talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
