no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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