oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
