Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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