No subtext here. People are naked.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
