I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
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