She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Randomize