I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
