You're completely useless in the revolution.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
