I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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