I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I think i got beer on your cat.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
