i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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