Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
