I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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