I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
he had hair everywhere except his balls
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Randomize
