Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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