I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
