I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
