What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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