I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Randomize
