Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
