I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
