It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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