That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Randomize
