as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Even the bartender felt bad for me
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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