Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
