I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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