the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
