Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
