I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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