Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
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