Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
love makes seman taste better
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize